i can do the cupid shuffle

just got home from the first official "top chef" night. made the most amazing food with miss and molly, we are awesome. started with deleicious rice and corn casserole followed by sweet and sour sausage, endng with the delicious chocolate chip cake with homemade chocolate frosting. we are pretty much unstoppable. then caleb reminded us that woman were created as man's punishment... yes, he will be missed. molly was waiting for him to get smart with her, she'd been talking about hitting him with a bat for quite some time.

mc escher rap video "going up the stairs and going down the stairs and going up the stairs and going up the sideways stairs"

school in the morning, need to find some extra credit, i could use ten points since i already missed a day of class.

had a huge high school drama production, realized i cant control other people (who would have thought). i know where i stand in my relationship and thats the best feeling right now. i would do whatever it took to make sure that he never felt pain, but he gots him some crazy in his closet. i shall arm myself for a battle royale. 18 pizza pockets.

so i just got home from the norton's; we attempted to clean the basement and succeeded at devouring dominos and watching the knowing. tomorrow is gonna be top chef party and i hope we make chicken satay. i have to work in the morning and its supposed to be a beautiful day so that is super exciting. my brother is gonna be in the park too, so i will keep my eyes peeled for him. i was so scared about the way i have been feeling these last two days, i didnt want to go to school this morning or work tomorrow, i just wanted to go eat worms and die. i made it through today so much better than i thought i would and i have soooo much to do and soooo much to look forward to, im excited. weird, huh?

sorority life is being ridiculous!

inside jokes have brought me back to life. love.

if those cars were paper, they'd be a paper jam!

just got back from the city with gma ginny and molly and checked my facebook and KODY POSTED!!!! he says "computers dont work well, facebook IS banned but they got around it for now, its awesome (hundreds if your from SA), and he might never come back!" thats a loose quote BTW. i feel beyond better, although now i may never sleep and i will just sit and stare at my facebook-friends-chat-list-guy-thing because he posted that like an hour after i went to bed. hrmph. he needs to find some way to contact us because gma ginny is going to chinca in 6 days. she wants to see him and they may just miss each other if he cant talk to any of us. ok thats enough whining for today blech !

so i dropped my intro to teaching class, as i have previously mentioned, but this professor took it one step further where it literally made me not want to be a teacher anymore. the only thing in my life that i have actually been passionate about is my magazine journalism dream. i think that i have been having such a problem at CLC is because anything that i thought i was working towards is not what i was passionate about. i think im going to be able to make it through this associates program at clc and then start contacting columbia again. saw the devil wears prada for the first time and put the two together in my head, i could sooooo be meryl. wellll i could be the boss and run the joint but i could never be meryl. (it says "i beat meryl") so i kinda got excited all over again because honestly that is the one career choice and education path that i was ever excited about and happy to succeed at.

about to start watching the new tool academy season with miss molly jane. YAY!

getting tired, gotta take gma ginny and molly to the city tomorrow, should be fun, but we have to get up so early... i want a day to just sleep, i shall name this day sammday and it should come right after tuesday!

work is going well... sebastian starts school tomorrow... im flippin exhausted, i have so much more to say, like about caleb cracking me up with his "gosh, you've been wearing that shirt since you put it on!" but i cannot even think, these damn tools!

i do have to mention how much i miss my bub, which is like a babe but adorabler! i am DYING to hear from him and its gonna be so great when he gets a chance to call or something... :)

wait no more, the eagle will soar, say goodbye to your friends, cuz you're out the door!!!!!!

who loves orange soda? samm and kel!

i am fine. i am fine. i am fine. i truly AM fine, im not just telling myself that, its just really sucky to not hear from someone that your daily life pretty much depends on. i miss him terribly, horribly, awfully; yeah that deserves a period. period. i have issues making up stories in my head, seeing as how i will one day be a published author, and the stories here range from bad to worse. i just need to hear from him, i am crying my little eyes out to the point where you have to tears and you are just making the crying noises... so either i get email or something from the boy or 11.6 people have to tell me how everything is fine and great and all that jazz.

so i got up for work this morning and did NOT want to go. not just because people dont want to work but because i felt like i had learned next to nothing in the last few days of training and "final destination-like" tragedy was destined to happen because if me. so i went to work and met one of the leads on my ride, and he was a pretty cool kid, so i felt better. then i started "training" with this BA kevin. go kevin, you rock! so i felt better. then i saw EK, so then i felt AMAZING!!!!! then i went to kiddie rides and was nervous for like 30 minutes and as my day progressed i just felt better and better, so thank you everyone that i worked with and saw today for making me wanna come back tomorrow! i cant wait!
i am covered in bruises and my whole body hurts, i have never worked outside, or lifted so many kids and it is taking its toll. i need a massage. (awww i miss kody.) then a little praying mantis decided to be my buddy for the day. i am not a bug person and i think that every insect has the potential to kill someone, especially a child so when this little guy perched his green behind on my fence, i had to take action so that he did not kill a child. i CALMLY and kindly took a notebook and attempted to get him from the fence to a tree, HOWEVER these things fly! go figure, right? so seeing as i wear a rather bright shade of greenish yellow, he flew and landed on my very welcoming chest, as i tried to shoo him away CALMLY he landed on my back, then shoulder, then crawled just out of my CALM reach. but we both made it out alive. all is well.

gotta get sebastian in school, they are apparently terrible at following through on anything.
gotta balance my checkbook, now that there is real money in there.
gotta catch 'em all.
gotta get my boys and my nephew together ASAP, and see my family for that matter!
gotta let you know.

it gets late so early, without you here!

it seems to me that when you are lonely you get tired, and when you get tired you blame that tiredness on the fact that its late. i think i let other people dictate my lateness because now that im all alone its all of a sudden... late.

sidenote:
Dj made a sundial out of Becky's birth control pills.

i am kinda nervous to go to work tomorrow, im having "new job cold feet". i hope its sunny so i get to work a whole day and i learn a lot and i get over my fear of... of... of... yeah i dunno. gotta continue to look for a job with more hours, thinking about trying to get a serving job so i can learn to bartend so i can make BANK dinero. i am trying to get my shit together but its kinda of a process and im stuck at step one. yeah, if anyone knows which step that is, please let me know so i can figure out how to get to step two.

i still havent heard from kody, i know he is fine, and i know he is having fun, and i know he is fitting in and getting settled.... but i know im selfish and wanna get some type of correspondence ASAP! so if anyone is in China, let him know i say "what up kid?" ok? ok.

Everybody's working for the weekend.

it's true, everyone, who's anyone, is working for the weekend!

i'm having a huge issue with the boy being gone. i was fine, grouchy but fine, then i dropped his butt off at the airport. parking at the curb and saying goodbye SWEET; pulling away from the curb and leaving him to get on the plane MELTDOWN. talking to him on the phone an hour later just to make sure they didnt arrest him in security SWEET; remembering too late to call again before he boarded MELTDOWN. tracking the plane, and doing globe experiments with miss SWEET; waiting up til 2am when his plane would land (315pm there) and realizing dude not calling MELTDOWN. being totally proud of everything he accomplished and everything he worked so hard to do to actually get him to China and knowing that this is gonna be like a chill experience in his life and its so good for him and im so lucky to have him and that he IS coming home (thanks everyone for reminding me... all the time) fucking SWEET; random things that remind me of him and pictures of him and his vm i had saved on my phone and the video of the duck joke and not having that other half of me that knows and understands everything about me at every moment... yeah i cry then.

now that i got that out, today was christian's birthday, i cannot believe he is 2 years old. my kids are getting older and im getting younger its soooo weird. i just got my first job in like 2 1/2 years last week, so this will be my first weekend working, wish me luck! i dropped my intro to teaching class at CLC already after the first day i knew me and her were not gonna make it 16 weeks, so i saved my money! cheap window paint from hobby lobby ate my car so i have the permanent Blinkmobile. watching Project Runway and wishing they played Top Chef every night. i do believe i am going to go to bed so i can get up for work in the AM. so yeah keep up with my rad blog, peace.